This one takes a bit to get going and funny, but once he starts, he keeps it going hard. Copyright Fandango. Were just gonna have lunch. Ive got go get a six-pack of beer and a frozen pizza. All right, yall shut up. Great big, old big uns. Two brothers trying to make it as dancers open their own club, but their artistic drive soon clashes with the business, threatening their relationship. Cause I dont care if shes a little salty. That guy cant drive my fucking car. I fucking hate geese. A broom handle, a pool cue, a fucking plunger. Gag, woman, gag. Ron White: If You Quit Listening, I'll Shut Up 2018 | Maturity rating: 15 | 1h 3m | Stand-up Comedy Ron "Tater Salad" White dishes out his signature brand of cynicism, riffing on sex, celebrity and the sinister habits of wild geese. But why settle for fictional tall tales when you can sit back and enjoy Whites actual road stories. Baby goose pussy lips makes wagyu beef taste like boo boot leather. No. Its not like if I told youthe story without saying that, youd have gone, That was very short and happened a long time ago. And if youd like to buy the bicycle, just go to my house in Beverly Hills, and its 400 yards from there. I got to what? And you cant un-fuck the housekeeper. Nonbinary 'Yellowjackets' Star Liv Hewson Is Sitting out of Emmy Season Over Gendered Categories, 'Yellowjackets' Season 2 Episode 5 Recap: Digging the Antler Queen, Drew Barrymore Admits She's "Not Sure" She's "Drawn to the Manscaper" on 'The Drew Barrymore Show': "I Love Funk", Drew Barrymore Opens up About Up Close and Personal Interview Style: "I Feel This Magnetic Pull", Why Isn't 'The Drew Barrymore Show' on Today? Director Tom Forrest Writer Ron White Star Ron White This befuddled me. And it turns out, theyve been snipping the pussy lips off of baby ducks in Saudi Arabia for 1,500 years and just throwing them in a river, and the cook from the Four Seasons went there and saw this amazing waste of baby duck pussy lips, and just started thinking, you know, Fuck Tacos! PETA hates it. And that was the first timeall three of us had our names on big signs in Vegas, and we went outside to look at it, and I was like, Fuck, now what? So Ive just driven from Dallas to Sacramento to make $400. Ill give you a second to get your arms around that. Bring it into the shop. No other fucking animal does this. Just getting her done, and He wasnt there, but the three of us were. Yo, bitch, what the fuck you going to do about it? Lock those beady eyes on you. What?. Well, which one is it? Dont you fucking do it. And he fucking did it! Whats the problem? I said, I ordered a movie, it said, Please enjoy your feature film, but nothing came on the TV. She goes, What did you order? Cast Away. Coming Soon, Regal Its like you were waiting in line for two hours to ride a roller coaster and it finally shows up and the seats are kinda bumpy and worn out. I go back up to the room and shes passed out, in this negligee, and shes fucking gorgeous. Im not doing that either. You were right! Cinemark Ladies, if you dont like the way the cooch is looking, before you go do something that extreme, try this. Get the freshest reviews, news, and more delivered right to your inbox! [cheering and applause] Thats pretty slick. our special coverage of the white house correspondents dinner starts right now neck . Maybe a salad and a sandwich. Bienvenidos a un nuevo episodio de Estrenos en Netflix!Hoy vamos a hablar de un especial de comedia de Ron White que se llama "If you quit listening, i'll sh. This is how the conversation ended. You should have the person help you move all the shit out and then shoot him. Its almost like theres a clown there. Fuck it. Thank you very much. Not two eyeholes like those other sluts. Watch Ron White: If You Quit Listening, I'll Shut Up | Netflix Official And undeniably funny. Ron White: If You Quit Listening, I'll Shut Up - Netflix But when somebody breaks into our house now, they discover that all of our things have been chewed up and pissed on. And then I was watching Godfather, I thought, Well, if instead of that horse head, they just had Chris Hemsworth with no shirt on. Sign in to rate and Watchlist for personalized recommendations. It seemed like they would give you a sack or something. My uncle was a Baptist preacher, and I was at his little white clapboard Baptist church in a little bitty town in Texas and I was sitting Vacation bible school. Downloads only available on ad-free plans. Ron White: If You Quit Listening, I'll Shut Up - Netflix Thanks a lot. [mooing] Welcome to our giant all-you-can-eat food trough. And not because if somebody was breaking into our house, they would make a bunch of noise and scare those people away, because you couldnt possibly wake them up. Just enough to keep from bumping into shit. Okay. In this hour, White regales his audience with anecdotes about a young fan approaching him at The Comedy Store in Los Angeles, about how he lost his virginity at 18 over and over again to prostitutes, his offbeat presidential ambitions, and even how he tried to overcome his anxiety with bedwetting as a child. Queen Charlotte: A Bridgerton Story: Season 1, Link to Marvel Movies Ranked Worst to Best by Tomatometer, Link to Asian-American Pacific Islander Heritage, Link to RT25: Celebrating 25 Years of Rotten Tomatoes. Go behind the scenes of Netflix TV shows and movies, see what's coming soon and watch bonus videos on, Ron White: If You Quit Listening, I'll Shut Up (Teaser), Ron White: If You Quit Listening, I'll Shut Up (Trailer). They all look like fucking tents. My friend told me the other day that he wouldnt give his wife head unless she just came out of the shower, and I told him Ill give my wife head if she just came out of the gym. You dont have to kill the baby duck to get the pussy lips off of it. Your email address will not be published. Baby goose pussy lips makes wagyu beef [laughing] Okay. And thats about a 45-second task with me at 18 years old. That Yale snob fucking piece of shit, fucked me out of so goddamn much money. Apparently there were some unanswered questions in Fat Midgets Fucking Fat Midgets. 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Two years ago, White co-starred in Cameron Crowes one-and-done season of Roadies for Showtime. that does it for me tonight, thanks for spending part of your saturday with us. Do you have any advice, Mr. White? Now, Id just got off the ugliest phone call Ive ever had with my wife, and it was about that house, and part of that house was gonna be a rehearsal space for her band, and while I was shooting a pilot in Vancouver, it turned into a 24-track recording studio. Ron White has his unique way to bring his jokes, with his heavy voice abused from years of cigars and alcohol he gets your immediate attention. Ill tell you this story. 6:01, gets there. Well, Bills doing one show at the big Forum down at Caesars, and were doing three shows a night in a smaller room. Get too fat at the Golden Corral, go to the Dress Barn. Thats insensitive right there. Hes still having too much fun. RON WHITE: IF YOU QUIT LISTENING, I'LL SHUT UP (2018) - FULL TRANSCRIPT October 19, 2018 Ron "Tater Salad" White dishes out his signature brand of cynicism, riffing on sex, celebrity and the sinister habits of wild geese. You guys are amazing. And it turns out I had no problem with it at all. What? You go anywhere in West Hollywood, theres these gigantic gay mens clubs with these huge patios. Ron "Tater Salad" White dishes out his signature brand of cynicism, riffing on sex, celebrity and the sinister habits of wild geese.Ron "Tater Salad" White dishes out his signature brand of cynicism, riffing on sex, celebrity and the sinister habits of wild geese.Ron "Tater Salad" White dishes out his signature brand of cynicism, riffing on sex, celebrity and the sinister habits of wild geese. Ron White: If You Quit Listening, I'll Shut Up - Netflix 'If You Quit Listening, I'll Shut Up': Ron White's Netflix special And, uh this is a story my mother told me I should do on stage. You think you know tender but you really dont. Turns out its a solid one. Thanks for playing along. After a weird couple of years, John Mulaney comes out swinging in his return to the stage. Cause usually if a woman is that beautiful at 40 and never been married, either they give horrible head or theyre completely insane. And You Might Be A Redneck had been the number one-selling comedy album in the country for a year and a half. I picked up the DVD, looked at the cover, it looked like somebodys trying to shove a pumpkin through a beach ball. Just laying there dead, cause it died somewhere? ", Stream It Or Skip It: 'Moonage Daydream' on HBO Max, a David Bowie Biography That's More Sensual Experience than Documentary, Personality Crisis: One Night Only Finds Punk Pioneer David Johansen Recounting His Many Lives, Stream It Or Skip It: 'The Legacy of J Dilla' on FX/Hulu, Exploring The Life, Beats, And Career Of The Late Hip-Hop Hero, Stream It Or Skip It: Little Richard: I Am Everything on VOD, A Biodoc As Vibrant As Its Subject, The Peter Pan & Wendy Sea Shanty Is An Ear Worm That Will Haunt Your Dreams, Stream It Or Skip It: 'Peter Pan and Wendy' on Disney+, Director David Lowery's Lightly Visionary Disney Rehash, Where Was Peter Pan and Wendy Filmed? *****************************************************************************Donate belowYour contributions help support the channel!https://www.paypal.com/donate/?token=376E-66mSO9HVNOKHNfR6XaKkMJJ11H_3hh8b15mFOUQcpHHDeBUDuuMYQwlvkjM9gARI0\u0026country.x=CA\u0026locale.x=******************************************************************************Needing Assistance to Create/Host your Website, check out blue host below:https://www.bluehost.com/track/phlavaFind the Perfect freelance services for your business eg) logo design and branding, dropshipping, illustrations, clothing design, business cards, t-shirt designhttps://track.fiverr.com/visit/?bta=206481\u0026brand=fiverrcpaFor Fiverr Logo Design:https://track.fiverr.com/visit/?bta=206481\u0026brand=fiverrhybrid\u0026landingPage=https%3A%2F%2Fdiscover.fiverr.com%2Flogo-design-7%2FFor Fiverr Social Media Design:https://track.fiverr.com/visit/?bta=206481\u0026brand=fiverrhybrid\u0026landingPage=https%3A%2F%2Fdiscover.fiverr.com%2Fsocial-media-grid-design-2%2FFor Fiverr Animated intro Video:https://track.fiverr.com/visit/?bta=206481\u0026brand=fiverrhybrid\u0026landingPage=https%3A%2F%2Fdiscover.fiverr.com%2F%3Fs%3DAnimated%2BIntro%2Bvideo And you know why theyre having so much fun? And right before I went on stage, I was in the green room of the main room, and they came over there and they said, Ron, they need you in the OR. I never thought anybody would fucking say that, you know? The motherfucker! I started this tour a while back in Las Vegas, and while I was there, I was walking down the Strip, my wife and I, and theyre having a sex toy convention, which is one of their five biggest conventions of the year. Do Not Sell or Share My Personal Information. I left everything in my room, and I tell the guy, Listen, I got to go back to the hotel. Now, I think its a little strange that vaginal rejuvenation is fine, yet its illegal to roll back the odometer on your car. So I really had to call and promote these shows and get everybody to come out, and I called this radio station in London. Ron White: If You Quit Listening, I'll Shut Up - Netflix Im also an idea man. You ever seen a dead goose anywhere in your goddamn life? White I was always going to tell you if I ever met you that when my father was alive, you were his favorite comedian by far. I said, Thank you very much for telling me that, man. We would sit around, drink, and and talk about maybe one day, you know? Ill walk back. Sean L. McCarthy Decider. Okay. I may or may not be a little drunk. Steals my sandwich. And before the thing started, I had my tour bus up there, Jeff and I are sitting on my tour bus and this Golden Corral commercial comes on television, which is where Jeff works now.

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